Vacanza Romana

The Casacolori - at last my haven from the street! The beautiful Giada welcomed me with big kisses Italian style – I am always afraid that I will go the wrong way when this happens and head butt the person instead of doing the air kiss 3cm beside the ear. I ask for lessons about the correct protocol later on!

A big chat, a shower, some lunch with Jenaro, Giada’s boyfriend an up and coming tattoo artist. They have a wonderfully huge painting of Betty Page in one of the rooms. I had a big comfortable room, a window opening on to the street, my own bathroom and Wi-Fi. And they have cool black vespa with a zebra seat. Giada runs the bed and breakfast and is a whole bunch of fun. All in all a tip top place!

Feeling refreshed I went for a walk and stumbled across the Spanish steps and then on to Fontani Di Trevi. Now at this point I have to mention teh traffic in Rome. It is chaos, or at least looks that way to the untrained eye. The right hand hook turns from teh middle lane, three motor scooters and one BMW in one lane on a road narrow enough to jump across, as on coming traffic hurtles down. And event the man with his dog between his ankles, clutching the collar with is left hand as he guns the scooter with his right through an intersection as narrow as a dunny lane in Balmain full of Land Rovers. Nobody blinks at any of this behaviour – I stand slack jawed, itching to put on a traffic vest and step out to impart some order onto this chaos, fearing only that I will end up mushed into the cobblestone streets and become one with antiquity. . But I have managed through my great skills as an investigative reporter and with academic qualifications in behavioural science (BHS101 1984 – Grade C) to bring you this inside.- THERE ARE TRAFFIC RULES. And they are as follows:

1. If you are at any time impeded from going forward, honk your horn.
2. If you see a pretty woman on the street or on a scooter (and in Rome this is a bit like looking up and seeing the sky), honk your horn.

As long as you follow these two rules the other laws of the road are of no consequence, as neither are the laws of physics. And the Zebra crossing? I have no idea what they are for, and who put them here. They are an archaeological mystery whose meaning has been lost to the ages.